Your relationships are all going to go through bad and good patches. It’s just part of being human. When we have a fight or a really good day with a loved one, it’s normal to want to call up a friend and have a long chat about it.
There’s nothing wrong with keeping your friends in the loop on the things that are happening in your life, of course, but you do have to make sure that you keep some things between you and your partner.
After all, the relationship is between you and your loved one, not between you, your loved one, and your friends, right?
Here are some of the most important things NOT to Tell Your Friends About Your Relationship that have to be kept between partners. As you will see, they’re pretty straightforward
Money
Every couple has problems with money, be it related to the other partner in the relationship, or simply a hard time that has them looking hopefully under the couch cushions. If you are a partner who is worrying about money, venting to your friends is totally okay because it’s your problem.
If it’s the partner’s problem, keep it to yourself. As you will read about later, a partner’s problem is a partner’s problem, not yours.
On that same note, don’t feel that you have to hide the fact that you are suffering from money problems from your friends. You just have to make sure that you don’t go into any kind of humiliating specifics that only make your partner uncomfortable.
Go ahead and talk about the frustrations of it, and ask for ideas on how to make it work, but don’t give your friends the specifics of the situation unless it is purely your problem, not one between you and your partner.
Read More: 8 Ways To Make Any Girl Go Crazy About You
Fights
As with other issues (especially between girls), it’s common to want to rant and complain about squabbles and fights, but if you are sharing complete details, you aren’t helping the situation out at all.
Make sure that your loved one feels as though private issues stay private.
On that same note, if you feel the urge to talk to your friends (either as a guy or girl) make sure you’re in the right stage of mind. As with before, ranting is fine and healthy, but stick to the general frustrations of having a fight and how you feel about it.
If you are in an agitated state of mind, you’re more likely to give away those intimate details that will only make a fight worse.
Additionally, your friends love you a lot. So, if you paint yourself as an angel and him/her as a horrible person, they’ll hate that partner long after you’ve forgiven him/her and moved on.
Your friends are loyal to you more than they are to him/her, so keep that in mind next time you want to tell everyone how much you hate your partner for the couple of days that you are in a fight. It may have serious consequences that you will have no control over.
The bedroom
This is a biggie and is commonly done by girls. It’s normal to want to talk about all of the bedroom specifics and do a play-by-play. It’s normal and healthy. But, it needs to stay between you and your partner only. Period, no exceptions.
You wouldn’t want anyone else in the bedroom with you, right? So make sure that no one is, especially your girlfriends. If you need to gush about the details, do it with your partner or a journal.
Keep those things private and you’ll make sure that the relationship stays strong and only between you and your partner.
The temptation is strong, but you need to make sure that you value the privacy of you and your partner more than your own desire to spread the good or bad news. There is a grey area on what is okay to tell your friends and not (some are okay with you telling your friends certain details, while others are not).
If you are curious and really feel as though telling your friends is important, talk to your partner first and make sure they are okay with that. It’s an important part of trust and loyalty, so choose wisely!
Personal history of the partner
As with some of the points above, you need to be careful what you share about your partner in regard to details of their lives. Sharing all of the scary and fantastic details about your own life is totally fine and great, but you have to be careful to value the trust of your partner.
This means that if they tell you something scary or worrisome about their past, you need to keep that confidence and keep the secret to yourself, no matter how much you want to share it.
Would you want your partner telling his/her buddies about something humiliating that you confided in him/her?
No, so use that same rule when considering what to blab to your friends about and what to keep private. There is a very important line, and it’s best not to cross it.
Read More: Why Is Kissing Important? Health Benefits of Kissing
Misdoings
Similar to what we talked about with fights, misdoings by you and your partner must be kept mostly between you two. General details are fine and okay to share for the most part, but keep the details to yourself.
Your friends will grow resentful of your partner if all they hear about are the bad parts of the relationship, and all of the details to go along with them. Be considerate of your friend and your partner and keep the details to yourself.
The most important rule is to trust your gut and/or reverse the situation. Would you want his/her friends to know this or that detail? If not, then it’s safe to assume that you shouldn’t be spreading it around, either. The above tips will help you keep all of the relationships in your life healthy and happy.
